Holy Family

This last Sunday the homily was amazing at our 5:00 pm Mass. The priest spoke about how today, the favorite shows of the youth are those about "Friends." Years ago, shows about family were popular because they were believable. Today, shows depicting an intact family with defined male and female roles is so far from reality that they cannot be popular. One of the central problems with our families today is that we are all more interested in personal fulfillment than in what we can give to others. That thought resonated with me, because I worry that I will give too much. I worry about "losing myself." I worry about not being fulfilled professionally. I realize that there probably isn't a "too much" in a marriage, and even if there is, I'm nowhere close to that point. I have chosen to be a wife first, and everything else second. We really want to have a strong family, and I know that in the end, all the worldly accolades will not matter. What will matter is how well I have loved my husband, and hopefully my children. My vocation as a wife is supported by my professional activies, not the other way around. Honestly, though, I wonder what all of that looks like for me. I sometimes feel like I'm just reaching in different directions hoping something will stick. The nice thing about the Navy was that the choices were limited... now my choices are still limited but in a different way. Figuring out what works with being a Navy wife is kind of difficult. You can't really build a career because you move at random times..so I think the solution to this is to figure out what does work with being a Navy wife. Something I like to do, and can feasibly do many places. For now, I think I'm going to stick with engineering, but I'm thinking that something combining theology and teaching will be what I move towards. I'm a little scared of teaching in NY public schools, plus I need a teaching certificate...and I can still make way more money with engineering...so it will make more sense to move to that down the road.